Witch & Wizard by James Patterson

Sherri Gardner Howell
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I don’t abandon books. I love to read, read a variety of different kinds of books and finish them all. That’s not to say I haven’t struggled through some, but, most of the time, I can find a few redeeming qualities that at least make me glad I stuck with it.

I now have a list of books I just could NOT bring myself to finish. Only one name on it: “Witch and Wizard.” The fact that it is a James Patterson book makes it even more surprising, and more annoying. I got to page 112 out of 256, hit the quote below and just couldn’t continue.

“Witch and Wizard” is set when the world has changed -- for no reason that is obvious -- and is now being ruled by “The One Who Is The One.” Wisty and Whit, two teenagers, are hauled out of their house and imprisoned, separated from their parents and condemned -- with their parents -- to death. Evidently Whit and Wisty don’t know they are a witch and wizard, although you’ve got to wonder why they never questioned their parents about their names.

Since the book opens with the family facing execution in an arena full of blood-thirsty people, I figuring the 144 pages I didn’t read are the two teens learning they have powers and trying to figure out how to save themselves, their parents and the world.

I hope they figured it out. Nothing could save this book. It was simplistic, juvenile even if it were meant for a younger audience, and insulting in its lack of plot and character development. While I didn’t care for “The One” or for the loser Byron Swain, a “hall monitor” who rose to power under The One, I didn’t give two shakes for Whit and Wisty either.

If I get to feeling too guilty about having a list of books (book) I didn’t finish, I may force myself to suffer through the last half of “Witch and Wizard.” I don’t think so, though. Every time I start, I hit another round of sterling dialogue: “Just then the door to our cell crashed open, and the Matron stood there with two of her nastiest, beefiest armed guards. Call ‘em Joe and Schmo. We did.”

James! What were you thinking? Don’t buy, borrow or start this book. Abandonment is too good for it.

Have you read “Witch & Wizard?” Discuss your thoughts on the book below.

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